Ep 175 - "Post Father's Day Reflections"

0:00 Wow. How many of you have listened to the Head, Heart & Boots podcast? I can't tell you that react how much that means to us. Welcome back to the Head, Heart & Boots podcast. I'm Chris. And I'm Brandon. Join us as we wrestle with what it takes to transform ourselves and the businesses we lead. This new camera angle makes my arms look smaller than yours. I'm noticing that and I really appreciate it. I thought you did that on purpose. No, I don't. I didn't. And I am not happy with it. What's up, amigo? I'm just steadying myself. We had a little preparatory chat. A little pre-show prep there. What were we going to talk about? We clearly found the vein, so to speak, which I'm excited about.

0:44 Man, it's been a little bit of a minute. Boy, I think you've seen more hotel rooms than your own master suite over the last several weeks. Certainly the business has got us chasing our own rear ends a bit right now. Can I tell you, there's a little part of me that felt a little bit guilty about my last trip. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Well, you're just quickly. So no one starts feeling weirdness. Kara was with you. Yeah, there was nothing like that. Go all dang, bro. No. So this was a, I was asked to come speak at VOTA, Cleaning and Restoration at their conference. There was their first annual conference in Madison, Wisconsin. It was great. Some people that follow me saw that I posted on Facebook about that, but awesome time.

1:26 But I was just like, And it was work. I had a two hour keynote. There's a lot of prep and all the things, blah, blah, blah. But I got a lot of time to just like hang with my wife. Yeah. I didn't need to be at all of the sessions and all that stuff. So I had some time to like, we rented bikes, you know, we rent. Wait a minute. Let me get this straight. I feel a little guilty because I had a really great time. Yeah. So you're on the road while I was working. And in my mind, I'm making all these excuses why you're not available on I mean, you're trying to tell me you were enjoying yourself. Let's rewind. From morning to night, when I wasn't speaking, I was hunkered down in my hotel room, doing outbound prospecting, trying to grow the business, meeting with clients. That's much more like it. That's much more like it.

2:07 Okay. So anyway, yes, the travel schedule has been intense though, but we're in a two, I think neither you or I has any travel for the next maybe three weeks. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which is the most downtime you've had all year. Well, but think about like last year, dude, when you and I were traveling every week, it felt like, yeah, it was, it was crazy. So I've been meaning to tell you, and we'll do this in public. I've been meaning to tell you how much myself in the business has appreciated the fact that you've really taken the brunt of the travel this year. Well, I've been meaning to tell you I've missed you. I know. It's weird. Like, we really enjoy traveling together. Yeah, man. I mean, you know, it's like, of course, we like to be home with our wives and stuff.

2:50 But I was talking to Kara about that. I was like, you know, it gets lonely on the road. Yep. And like, well, I don't know. I mean, I just, you and I had our routine. We enjoyed each other. Like, it was, and we were just constantly collaborating on the thing that we were doing while we were traveling. So it was just like, I don't know. like we knew at some point it wasn't good. Like as we grow, there was no way that we were going to be able to travel together like that. Cause somebody has got to hold down the fort and run the operations. Part of the evolution. Right. But, uh, yeah. Been a busy summer. It has been. Okay. So this is, this is interesting guys. Hold on. We're doing, we're doing a little post father's day reflection.

3:31 And, uh, You know, many of you probably have heard the episode that we did with the loopers. Yeah. And it was one of those, I think, rare occasions where there's a real clear pointing towards the fact that father-son relationship in the midst of building companies is very healthy and intact. And you saw that. I mean, it was obviously part of the conversation and reflected several times. And so there is that. And then there's a lot of what many of us, I think, experience when we're trying to build things, when we operate companies and companies. And really, for men in general, and this is a fairly stereotypical comment, but I think it's probably statistically more true than not.

4:17 There's this weird drive to go produce, go create out there. And man, can we sacrifice a lot of things, sometimes intentionally, but a lot of times not in the pursuit of that business. And I think coming out of Father's Day, it makes sense to slow down for a minute and just ask ourselves some hard questions and... and reflect on some of the things that we've been experiencing as dads and business owners, and just kind of share some of that with the community because inevitably we're not alone in that. And we're, we aren't the only ones that experience an array of wins and losses as we pursue the growth of our companies and support our people. So, That's where we're going to go today.

4:58 We're not entirely sure the structure of this. I think it's just a little more of a think out loud. And I think there's probably a strong chance that some of the stuff that you and I are wrestling with, we're not the only ones. So that's kind of where we're going. Well, it's quite possible I may cry and make people feel uncomfortable. We'll see. Yeah. So Father's Day, it's interesting. This is my second Father's Day without my dad. And, uh, people have heard me talk about that. If you follow the podcast, I've mentioned that several times, I think. And, you know, I've, I've shared some of the story and I think all of us have a version of the whole, you know, I guess those of us that are lucky enough to have our fathers in our lives is we also generally have disappointments.

5:39 Yeah. You know, there's, there's things that I think that some of us feel like maybe we missed out on, or it wasn't quite the way we wish it had been, or there was, uh, parts of the relationship that we wish were a little bit different, you know? Yeah. Yeah. And of course, when a parent dies, that's the end of our opportunity to have that, to make that relationship what we wanted it to be. And I was really fortunate in the last few years with my dad. I was able to experience a level of closeness with him and understand him that was really awesome. And intentionality. Oh, and I pursued it. There's something in me, and I think a lot, I've talked to other people about this, you and I've talked about this. There is something in me, and you had a similar drive at the end of your dad's life, like I feel like I need to re-engage that.

6:27 For me, it's like I need to know my dad. I need to talk to him about these things that I wish were different. Whatever. I feel so lucky. Purely lucky. Great gratitude. that my dad was willing to meet me there. And so he and I grew pretty close the last few years of his life. And yet there were still things about our relationship that we just never really got to experience, you know? Yeah. There are certain experiences I want to have with him, adventures I want to have that we just didn't have. So fast forward this last year has been at intervals, like really difficult. It was hard on my boys. My wife and I were able to be there with my dad when he passed away, but my kids weren't. And so that's been a different kind of grieving for them.

7:08 Mm-hmm. Because all of them were pretty close to my dad. All that to say, like, this last year has been a huge year of reflection of just the meaning of my relationships with my kids and my wife since my dad died. It just kind of like all of the stuff that I'd already kind of been thinking about and processing of just how important my family is to me and how I want to... I want to give my best to those relationships was just amplified and just this huge, heavy or, and inspiring way. Like I don't want to die however many years or decades that is from now without really being, being the kind of dad that I think my parents, my kids want me to be.

7:50 I'm not sure quite how to say that, but, but as much as I possibly can, I want to, to build a special connection with my kids so that they don't have regrets and disappointments. Yeah. You know, that, that surely there's still going to be things that bother them about me and that bothers me about them and all those things. We're just in relationship, but that, that, I don't want to have regrets when I someday face my deathbed. And so that's just been a really present part of my life the last year. And, um, and I've really, really been sowing into that and sometimes not getting the balance right. Yeah. There's been times where I've leaned into that. There's been a cost to how much I've been giving to the business. And I've told you this before, just how grateful I am for you to step in the gap for, for me this last year.

8:35 Like, you've really allowed me, and it hasn't been without cost. You allowed me to sort of process the death of my father and lean into the family and be that, you know. And I really appreciate it. Team sport, bro. Yeah. So last night, of course, Father Day was Sunday, Father's Day. And I'm sitting on the back porch around the fire with my wife. It's like... 1030. We have a house full of teenage boys because my younger son is turning 14 and he wanted to have a sleepover. And so like we've, the house is full of 14 year olds. And so my wife and I sort of retreated to the back deck, which is our favorite retreat space. That was well played. We got this fire burning.

9:16 We're sitting there talking and snuggling on the, on the couch, on the deck and And I get a call from my son and he's at his girlfriend's house and they're, I don't know, hanging out and having dinner and stuff over there. And he had peeled off from the group and to call me. And he said, dad, you know, I had some things I wanted to say to you on Father's Day. Oh, man. I had some things I wanted to say on Father's Day, but I just felt like maybe it would make it less meaningful if this was just like a Father's Day message to you. And so I decided to wait, and I've just been sitting on this, and I just had some things I wanted to share with you. I said, okay, that's great. And he said, Dad, I just want you to know how much I love you. And I want you to know how much I look up to you.

9:59 He said, you know, I've observed my friends— and the fathers of my friends I hang out with, and they're good people and everything else. He said, but they're not the same as you. You've been such a presence in my life and somebody I look up to so much. And he's like, I really admire you. I admire how you live. I admire how you take care of mom. I admire how you do life and how you've shown up for all of us. And I just want you to know how meaningful that is to me. And I just want you to know how much I love you. That's the badge of honor right there. You know, he's 17. I said 17. Just turned 17. And there was this moment where I realized I got off the phone.

10:44 I was talking to my wife. And there was this connection in my head of, you know, I think I'm living in, like I feel so lucky. I'm living in the kind of relationship with my boys and with my older son in particular that I always wanted from my dad. And it felt so good in the moment. Like, honestly, it felt like following that conversation and just being with my wife out on the path. It was just a moment. You know, we have these moments. You know, for some of you, you can think of a moment that you had like this on the boat last summer with all your family around and it was a sunset, maybe, where you're just like, God, I'm so grateful.

11:26 It was one of those moments because, again, I have these unmet longings and just like certain things that I wanted from my relationship to my dad that I never got to experience. Many things I did, but there was still those things. And I realized in this moment, like in this moment, I have everything that I've ever wanted. I lack nothing. And I'm also aware too, it's interesting, earlier last night, I was hanging around with some of my really close friends. You guys have heard me talk about my cuss and disgust group. It's guys that hang out and most of us are all business people and whatnot. And And I just know that not everybody is in that same situation. And I just felt, I felt so much gratitude and the luck of it all in some ways.

12:09 I mean, I've certainly made choices. Like I said, like chasing my relationship with my father and reflecting on that and then wanting to be everything that I had hoped for from my dad, wanting to live that out and provide that to my kids. Yeah. And I just have to accept that some of it is luck. Like, I know people that have made all the right choices, and it doesn't always work out that way. You know, it's like, sometimes that's not what people experience. And I just feel so much gratitude for that. Yeah, it's one of those things, I think, over the last, you know, for sure, six months, I've just kind of been monitoring your commitment to relationships.

12:51 Like, and not, you know, I mean... Yeah, there's no disclaimer there. Like just leaning into relationship. I've watched you make and be consistent with cuss and discuss. And I know sometimes we make jokes and things like that. But the reality of it is you're stewarding a community of friends where there's an immense amount of trust and respect and mutually challenging it's a healthy environment. It's a really healthy environment. These are all high level people trying to win at life in a comprehensive way, not just be moguls at business. Cause I, I just think at the end of the day, sometimes I could gag on, you know, the, all the guru, you know, all the things work a bajillion hours a day and all the shit.

13:36 And the reality of it is, is it just consequently creates an environment where you end up in a bed alone at the end of days. And I, and, I know that's not the end state I'm looking for. I don't care how many commas are associated with it. I mean, I know that's not the priority for you. So anyways, I do want to commend you because it's hard. It's hard to prioritize community and prioritize relationships And ensure that while you're driving and chasing success in your business or building things because it's part of what you need to do to fill hole, I have watched you balance that with investing in relationship. And I think it's admirable. And I think it's really cool, man, that a 17-year-old boy is willing to step back and comprehend that what they have in the relationship with their parents, especially their dad.

14:30 And in that reflection, teenage reflection, and that's not taking anything from Jack. He's a smart kid. Teenage reflection to be able to look at that relationship and be able to communicate what he did, it's powerful. And it also means, and I think any parents listening, they understand how much work is going into that in order for your teenage son to recognize it. Because it's not, it's hard. It's hard for them in their worlds to see that. It's so hard, dude. Yeah. It's so hard. And I don't in any way want people to think that somehow I've managed to do it all. Like there's a freaking trade-off. And I struggle with it.

15:11 I really do. Like you and I have talked about this. I really do. Because there's a very real and present ambitious chaser in me that wants, I want to eke out every bit of potential that I have inside me, both for me and the experience of that and for what I can provide to my family and my friends and my community and all the things. And you and I both have a big vision for where we want to take floodlight. And the end is the hard part, right? But I also, you know, part of him saying, I believe I'm doing some interpreting, Jack, I admire the life you live and respect what you do.

15:51 Like he's not saying that because you don't have ambition and drive and you're not building things and sitting home and being available all the time. Yeah. Yeah. He's saying he sees the work, he sees the work and he admires the balance you're attempting to create and find and live out. And I think that's part of what makes him respect you so much. And, and I think, you know, I think sometimes that's the challenge, right? Is that we live lives that commonly look all or nothing, right? Yeah. And I think we miss the point, you know, what's the kind of that theory behind like a Renaissance man, isn't the ideas that they're, you know, they can be sophisticated and they can be, you know, primal and they can, artistic, right. They're like all the things, a lover, romance, all of it.

16:36 I think that is the goal. Actually, I think it is the goal. I think, you know, we were getting philosophical here, but yeah, I think it's a lot of goals, but I do, I think as I get older, man, and I see you and I have the benefit of seeing some very, very, very successful people. And some of the time it's worth imitating. Yeah. And then other times we see what was sacrificed and it's like, everybody knows you got to sacrifice for success. But when you see what was sacrificed, like, oh man, I don't think I'd make that trade off. Yeah. because I think life is to be lived with the people around us and the art, the music, the food, the friendships, the fires on the back deck.

17:24 Yeah. Like, yeah, What else is this about? Now, we can talk spiritual things, of course. Yes, absolutely. The impact we're having on others, yes. But where does that happen? It happens in community. It happens in relationship. It can happen at work also, right? But it is kind of all the things. And it is trying to find, do the dance of how do I commit myself fully? I think this is where I've been at. And what I'm chasing or what I'm really trying to lean into is, how do I show up and bring my best to the moment in front of me when I'm here at the office? How do I bring my entire focus to that?

18:06 And answer force. We tend not to give the attention to our call and take that I think we really ought to have as restorers. And of course, one of the biggest challenges we have with our call and take, whether it's an in-house receptionist or a service like answer forces, what do you do when your receptionist goes out to lunch? Well, AnswerForce makes that very easy to solve for, right? They're 24-7. You have a receptionist or a call intake person that's out for maternity leave, out on vacation, etc., etc. AnswerForce has a solution to all of those things. And I think, too, it also solves for us having a very consistent, repeatable call intake process. We all know how important that is. 100%. And the cool thing is actually we just hung out with these guys and they let us know, let us in on some big feature updates that have recently been pushed through the system.

18:51 So first, verified contacts, right? So verified contacts, basically it allows the system to understand that this is a repeat caller. And then it allows them to auto capture and fill those details as part of the intake process. So smoother, more professional intake. Much easier to kind of give that client that impression. It's awesome for commercial. There's different reasons, right? Or different layers of the cake, if you will, just based on what's going on in terms of call volume, what's going on time of day. And so with specialized scripting, the script then will match that.

19:34 And so it's shifting live, if you will, along with that kind of richer context of what's actually happening in the business. Then this other thing, I thought this was super cool, is dedicated phone numbers. So going back to that repeat client or that key client or customer, we now can associate a specific phone number to them. And so what happens is they get received very uniquely, right? So I can imagine creating a custom script for that client. We now can recognize a repeat caller and autofill and speed up their intake. And then on top of that, there's a specialized number that's dedicated to them. So you really get to marry up that professional service offering, right? That we're promising, if you will, during the prospect.

20:16 And right from the jump, if you've got a commercial client with specific needs or specific expectations, build that into the script at call intake. Yeah, it's super powerful, super powerful. Another one is just access to information wherever you are. So I don't know how many of you are already currently using AnswerForce. You should take it seriously in terms of getting a demo and checking them out. But if and when you shift over to them as a partner, the cool thing is now is that you've got access to all this data, all this information on the go from anywhere on your mobile device. And so you can literally check inbound, outbound calls. You can listen to recordings, actively coach the team, kind of like midstream, right? And so again, just a ton of efficiency, a ton of automation, and just higher levels of customization coming out of AnswerForce.

21:01 And it is so stinking affordable. This isn't just for big, multi-million dollar companies. This is for you that's still working out of your home shop, your garage. And it's also for you that are running a $25 million operation with four locations. It's just, it's pretty extraordinary. They work with some of the biggest companies in our industry and many of the smallest ones as well. So... Okay. Actionable. So guys, we have talked about our friendship and relationship to these guys for a long time. Many of you know, in the recent probably year, and over the last several months, just this hyper focus on the efficiency and quality of our estimating, right? Like at the end of the day, our cashflow is heavily impacted by our team's skill and competency around writing a really comprehensive sheet and really making sure that the scope is accurate.

21:48 And one of the powerful things that Actionable has is their actual Xactimate profile. And this profile is a live AI tool that's monitoring you as you write the estimate. And as you're implementing specific line items, it's helping you be sure that you've really taken into full account all the individual elements and line items associated with this element of the scope that you're trying to accomplish. And I'm not going to highlight any specific teams, but we have heard robust numbers from teams using this. We're hearing everything from 5%, 6%, even 8% top line growth, specifically from the quality of their estimates increasingly. I remember when they rolled this out to you that one of the use cases or part of the value that they were trying to hit on is the ability for us to bring up a new estimator quickly up to the standard and competency and the results ultimately of the more experienced estimators on the team, right?

22:45 So this is an incredible onboarding and training tool to get somebody up to where they're very, very competent and producing quality estimates just that much faster. Way faster. And just one last thing I kind of want to hyperindex on is they have just an absolute boatload of white papers and F9 supporting notes. And so this is something that you could participate in being a member with Actionable Insights. But guys, we all know that getting our estimates approved in that negotiation phase is hard right now. It just feels like every carrier is significantly understaffed. They're fighting for error. We're fighting for error. And anything we can do to reduce that friction is better. And so the better we are at providing really good support for what we're calling out in our scope and why we're calling for it, the better.

23:29 And so these white papers, these F9 support notes are super powerful. Man, it's been a little while, but we've been kind of refueling the relationship with CNR quite a bit lately. And that's been good, man. I think both teams got so dang busy. We had a tough time kind of locking in and getting some face time together. But the team over at CNR has been great for our industry, you guys. You know, we've often referred to Michelle as a friend of the industry. She really is keyed in on giving us what we need in terms of tools, communication, intel on the industry. And so we just continue to encourage you guys, participate, make sure that you're receiving your quarterly copies and that you're getting all the online content that just comes in boatloads from their team.

24:12 So CNR Magazine, guys, pay attention, make sure that you're participating and getting your intel from that team as well. Liftify, bro. Yeah. Liftify, you know, it's interesting. Yesterday, I was just seeing one of our clients was getting awarded their 750 Google Review trophy. And they were already talking about hitting 1,000. 1,000. That's right. Which somebody has done. Yes. One of our clients has done it. It's remarkable. And I think the most remarkable thing that people are discovering, and we're seeing this every single day with our clients, is that when you start upping the volume of Google reviews you're getting consistently week after week, the recency, when you're getting the recency dialed in and just meaning every week you're adding Google reviews to your profile, dramatic jumps in organic...

24:59 phone calls in lead gen. And of course, who doesn't want that? Every single one of us, including Floodlight, we want that. And that's why we've indexed on, we use Lyftify to build up our Google reviews. So it's a simple turnkey service. They've really created a process for capturing the most quality Google reviews from the jobs that you're already getting. So if you want to get more work, grow your revenue just off of the existing work you're already getting. Liftify is a big part of how to do that. And it's simple. It's very, very cost effective. From our experience with Liftify and what we've seen with our clients, significantly better value and better results than many of the other platforms that some of you might already be trying.

25:39 So if you're not happy with the number of Google reviews you're getting, you need to reach out to Liftify. And I think as a point of reference, it's worth us saying. Liftify expects 20% to 25% conversion. So think about that within your own numbers. If you're doing 1,000 jobs a year, you should be adding 200 to 250 Google reviews to your profile every single year. If you're performing under that, You owe it to yourself to reach out to liftify.com forward slash floodlight. You know, one last thing to add to that as part of their kind of more recent integration of AI or advancing that integration of AI. One of the big focuses for their team is gathering more live project data and analytics for you guys. And so really what this is focused on is equipping all of us to create better customer experiences.

26:24 so not only are they keyed in and driving Google reviews for us but now they've actually turned the corner and began developing toolkits for us that use Liftify to actually be getting information that can help us modify our service delivery to create better client experiences super powerful we're talking mid-job yeah super powerful alright liftify.com All right, guys. Thanks for hanging out with us. Let's get back to the show. It's interesting you say that. Brendan Brouchard, you know. For those of you who aren't aware, I'm sure there's maybe five people that don't know who that is. Kind of one of your life consultant, coach, guru guys, super influential guy.

27:05 Long story short, he created... kind of this daily journal. Oh, yeah. And one of the items inside this daily journal. In fact, I think you and I have talked about it. I've used this journal for a while. I think I got it, too. I use it for a while. Yeah. It's inspiring to me. Yeah. So one of the comments in it, or one of the things that you take note of as part of your kind of like morning ritual is who needs the best from me today, is the question. I think that's just kind of going back, you know, or it points towards like, why did Brennan Bouchard, high influence, high capability, do your best, be meaningful, right? He's got kind of a life-threatening thing that he experienced that motivates it.

27:45 Anyways, long and short of it. It's like you kind of can see where he's going with that. Right, it's this intentionality by starting or behind starting each day, wanting to be as effective in relationship as we possibly can. And then asking, starting by asking that question, like who needs my best today? And I think it's so easy for me to box check that, write my four names so that I've done my thing and the blinks are filled in. But man, to honestly reflect on that and then think to yourself throughout the day today, um, I've identified people, relationships that need the best from me.

28:26 And I've contemplated to myself, how am I going to show up and actually honor that? And I think kind of broadly, it is such a reminder to me how much work and effort is required to have those kinds of experiences. Yeah. And the reality of it is, is I don't think that's true.

29:06 Like, I think the reality of it is, is your son's value in his relationship with you is the struggle, is him seeing the struggle and him watching how you live that struggle out. And you try to find that cumulative balance between these priorities. If there was no struggle, there'd be no honor. There would be nothing for him to respect. Yeah. I don't know where the hell I was going with that, but I just, I mean, it's just kind of where my head is, you know, in regard to some of the things that you're saying right now. God, it's just so gratifying. Yeah. You have these moments. And I turned to my wife after she could hear it from the head sex. We were sitting really close, you know. Yeah. The headset or the handset?

29:47 Yeah, the handset, the phone. She could hear it from the speaker. Did we use the term handset? No, I don't think so anymore. But I said, you know, I feel like what he said, in a lot of ways, is even more reflective of who he is. him calling me to tell me that. And even what, what I've been as a father, you know, like, like it, it really, I was telling Kara, I'm like the fact that he's thinking on that level and observing and noticing these things about like his experience with me and our experience within our family versus what he observes and some of his, you know, friends and extended, you know, folks that he's connected to.

30:27 Like it just, it makes, it fills me with, um, I don't know, excitement. I want to say pride, but I feel like I don't know how much credit I can take for that. You know what I mean? It's like I know I can take sound of someone. Yeah, I'm proud. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just proud. I was just like, you know, he's going to be okay. And there's pride in that that's yours. That's your boy. That's my boy. Yeah. He's such a good young man. It's really freaking cool, dude. To be honest, I think that's just so... So damn cool. I don't know. I'm not sure where you are on this, but this has been one of those years so far. And I did think about this a lot over the weekend, just kind of, again, have an opportunity to be around family.

31:13 And this has been a year where I am really locked in on this question of how? what do I want to attempt? What, what do I, what have I made backhanded comments to myself about or said, you know what I should just do or write like these little statements that we make, but then I am not doing it. Like I'm not actually taking the action. And part of that for me is this kind of concept of, What am I capable of? What else do I want to attempt? And then all of that being baked, and we've talked about this several times, of the fact I'm 48 years old, so I'm like straight up midlife. And there's just certain things I just don't want to freaking expose myself to anymore.

31:56 Like I don't care. I don't want to. And I want to respect myself enough and understand I only have so many years in the journey left that I'm not going to spend a bunch of time doing shit that people want me to do that I don't want to do. Right? Sure. Okay. All that to the side, like I'm wrestling currently with this mentality of what else do I want to give? What else do I want to build? And then I have these moments like I had on Sunday where I'm around family and I realize that. that there's more here. I, I can give more here. There's more to the relationship that I could be leading. And I'm not saying this in guilt or shame or woulda, coulda. It's like reflecting on what do I want to achieve?

32:37 What do I want to do? Here's a moment, like here's something in front of you. What part of this are you turning around in your head and, and, and trying to kind of grapple with my brain can be around this personal fulfillment drive of I'm a builder. I need to be creating. I'm not a farmer for those of you that maybe are wondering. I love the startup phase. I love the lift. I love all of that. And if I don't do it, my soul breaks down. Yeah. Like, like, My wife and kids don't get the best version of me if I'm not building.

33:18 Yeah. And I've sacrificed them in the past. Yeah. You and I talked very aggressively about trying not to do that this time around. Yeah. I'm not sure where I've landed the plane on that. Like, I feel like this is something I just continue to wrestle with that – that there's more I want to do and not just with floodlight. Like there's, there's just, there's things that you and I have in our own lives or experiences that we find interesting or personal pursuits or like not everything that we build and do is floodlight, right? There's going to be other endeavors, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. And so I'm just in this state where it's like, I don't know. Like the summary of my thoughts is, I don't know. I want to continue to create balance so that my kids, even though they're young adults, that I'm available to be a part of their life.

34:05 And I want to continue to honor my, some of the best years that Jana and I have left in our marriage while we're still young enough to travel and enjoy each other and adventure. Like at some point the adventuring slows down. Sure. You know, and so I'm, I'm wrestling with all of that amid, amidst this idea of man, floodlights young. Well, I got a big heroic journey in front of us. We've got so much to do still. We've got a young, just absolute killer leader in our company that I want to honor and respect and continue to, give him space and platform to succeed. Like there's so much to do. Yeah. You know, this is, this is where I go with it, man. That's exactly where I go as I think of Wayne.

34:47 And I think this is something worth like those of you that are listening that you have businesses and this is resonating with you. You, you, you want to be connected to your family and, and, and so forth. I think maybe the strategy is a simple, you know, if there's a simple version to it, where you can keep all the chips for yourself, but it's ultimately going to require everything from you. Yeah. And it's very likely that you're going to lose a lot of the other important things in your life or things that at some point may feel more important to you. Yeah. And I think some of the folks that I see that have really successful lives are, and rich relationships and deep, gratifying, fulfilling relationships with their spouse, with their kids, and, I think you can pretty clearly look inside their business and see that they've readily shared the rewards in such a way that they aren't having to carry the whole business.

35:46 It hasn't been, it hasn't simply been them building something for themselves. It's been them building a team and giving other people opportunities to participate in the dream. That's interesting. That's interesting. I like where you're going there. You know, because I think those are really two distinct pathways. And there's, you can win at both. Yeah. Yeah. The question is, what do you want the win to look like at the end? That's huge. Yeah, there's a little bit of opportunity cost weighing that we have the chance to do as leaders and entrepreneurs where there's an element of, like you said, that's interesting. Let's put it in terms of what the industry's been wrestling with quite a bit.

36:27 In industry, ours, Chris and I, the restoration industry, is consolidation, PE, purchase, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I've heard this comment a lot over the last 18 months to two years that I probably would have never used and hadn't used until then, and that is take some chips off the table, right? This idea of de-risking a little bit. Like you don't sell the whole enchilada, but sell a big hunk of it and have some lifting partners for this next part of your company's development. Yeah. And it's funny because that term really didn't have a ton of meaning to me, but I think kind of like what you just framed up is this idea of someone could weigh the opportunity cost of going alone, doing the whole lift, the ego reflection, the money, all the things.

37:15 And if the goal is to build, leave legacy, and do something of value and maybe hard, something hard that rarely people achieve and do, de-risk a little bit. Take some chips off the table, so to speak, and leave some of that for your relationships and your kids and your family. Because you can do it and not lose the real price of building something special. The legacy, the impact, all those things are on the table. You don't have to own the whole thing. You don't have to lead every element of it. And maybe that's the balance, you know? I think so. And honestly, you and I have both really been excited. We've been doing more work with PE and our clients have been, some of them are moving towards exits and going that PE route.

38:02 And I really find it gratifying to help them do that. You know, as we've gotten in those conversations because I know many of these people are young. And it's like, how awesome to be in a position where, to where you can exit a business and have enough money that you don't have to worry about money. I mean, I think for a lot of people to never have to worry about money again, yeah, maybe your pile of chips isn't as big as it could have been if you'd waited and built for five more years. Yeah. Almost certainly not, right? Yeah. Yeah. But to leave in a financial position to where you no longer have to worry about money, your family will not have to worry about money again. Yeah.

38:43 And then to be able to prioritize your time around those key relationships is just so freaking exciting. It is. And to be a part of helping people prepare their businesses for that, it's really been motivational to me. Yeah. Like inspiring. And to learn more about PE and stuff. Not because like, look, I mean, the PE thing is... You know, people have all different kinds of experiences with that, right? Yeah. But at the end of the day, certainly post transaction, but at the end of the day, you set yourself up. Well, you set your business up, right? That's the opportunity that people have is like you say, to pull those chips off the table. Also take on a different role in the business, which gives you, it gives you back your time. to be able to dedicate it more to like, you know, I eventually, I want to be snow camping more.

39:29 Yeah. With my buddies and take my boys. I want to be, you know, I mean, I have so many things on that list of everything, As I have more of the financial wherewithal, these are the things. And I think every single one of us has that. That does not take away from the fact that I don't ever want to stop building. Yeah. Like you and I've talked about this many times. I have zero desire to retire. And I think that's probably true of most of the owners that we work with. It's like retiring, I think for most entrepreneurs, is just simply changing the way you're building. Yeah. Yeah. Other people are building for you. You're providing capital and insight. Other people are doing the labor. And that's the opportunity that I think most of us are actually chasing.

40:13 But man, it's really easy to fall into the mindset of... bigger, just always be in a constant push for more. Yeah. Yeah. It's funny. When we were making the shift to our propel your business model, our consulting model, because, you know, we just wanted some formality. We wanted to equip other entrepreneurs to be good at being consultants because it's crazy. It's multiplication. It's influence. And as we were going through that process, we kind of started to re-acclimate around language more associated with exit strategy and things like that.

40:54 And one of the things that we were taking a look at is one of the fundamentally most difficult things for a business owner to prepare and or live through so that they can sell their business is the decoupling process. or the separation of their identity from the business. And, you know, it's interesting because in most of the context of those conversations, it was always centered around because you're about to not have the thing, right? And I think what's interesting about that is that I think it's a tool that we could deploy now. And really begin to understand like, so example, you know, for a lot of business owners, they don't grow past like certain size or scale because they have such a difficult time decoupling the value that they've kind of built on executing or being the trade craft person or the best estimator in the company or whatever, right?

41:48 We have a million different versions of this. And like the struggle for them is to let go and or like we've even had situations where we've had clients tell us I'm struggling now because you've taught me how to diversify and delegate. And now I have these people doing the things in my company that I always felt like if it wasn't me, it wouldn't work. And now I don't know what to do. Yeah. Right. I know. Which is, it's like it kind of sounds tongue in cheek, but the reality of it is, is if somebody says that to you, please understand there's an emotional thing that's taking place. Oh yeah. It's actually not that funny. No. Right. And so, so now I'm thinking to myself, well, how many times in that moment did I ask that entrepreneur, that, that client to, to say, Hey, why don't you go home and think about where you could be pouring water?

42:35 that energy and therefore coupling your identity to something maybe more meaningful. You know, and it's like in our client book, we don't have very many currently. And we have a lot of clients right now. I don't, we only have a handful probably that don't have kids as an example. Sure. So now I'm thinking about that guys, like as you're building these machines, even if you're in the three, four, five million mark, you know, you're in the three, four, five million mark. and you're being asked to create the vision for your business, and you're trying to understand how you decouple yourself so that you can allow more delegation and hand more over, maybe part of the challenge is you just haven't thought about where your time could be going that's just as important.

43:16 And maybe just spending some time over the weekend, right, and just considering like, gosh... if I did back off a little bit and I stayed more strategic in my position and where I spend my energy, what would I do with that time? And maybe that's the part of the equation. Maybe you just understanding where you're going to shift that energy to next intentionally. Maybe that changes your motivation. Maybe that makes it a lot easier for you to, to delegate and let your team member kind of screw some stuff up several times while they get the hang of it. I don't know. Yeah. I think it's a real thing. It's a real thing. I was talking shop with Eugene yesterday.

43:58 He was saying, when he engages with a client, he said he asked the question, so what are you trying to do? Which, of course, we do the same, right? So where are you trying to get? What are you trying to do with the business? He said, if somebody tells me they want to sell their business, he said the very first question he asked them is, hey, are you willing to not matter to your business? Wow. Wow. Are you ready for that? Yeah, it's good. Are you ready to not matter, to not be important to the business? Man. For no one to need you, for your business not to need you anymore. Are you ready for that? And think about it before you answer me. He said, because if somebody's not ready for that, or they haven't counted the cost of what that potentially is going to feel like and how it's going to affect them, it becomes a very difficult barrier.

44:44 It's destabilizing. Yeah, yeah. You know, I think we've had some experiences around that. as business owners, there's always this kind of like security blanket where I can insert myself and be really important. There's always something happening in the business that, that I have knowledge or experience on, or even skill and talent to address that, that it feels really good. Like for me right now, I know that at some point in within floodlight, I'm not going to be the guy up on stage or I'm certainly not going to be the only guy. And I really love that. Like I love to teach. It's very gratifying. It's, it's, it's probably more a part of my identity than, you know, I even want it to be longterm.

45:27 Right. But I, it's very gratifying. You know, it's like to, to be able to use your talent or your skill and, for people to recognize it and affirm it, it's that whole cycle of that dopamine. I got my dopamine hits, you know? Yeah, for sure. And at some point, in order for me, for us to get where we want to go, just like you've had to step back from the traveling to be in the operations, there's going to come a point where I have to lay that down. And instead of me up on stage or you up on stage, it's Wayne or it's somebody that's not even in our roster yet. Yeah. And so I, I think about that and it's like, Ooh, Whoa. Yeah. What am I going to invest myself in? when that time comes.

46:07 Yeah. And also, is there like some internal work? Yeah. Even before, like even outside of that, where it's like, wow, I find a lot of my identity in what I do. Yeah. And is that even healthy? Maybe, you know, and I think that's a question we always need to ask is just how much of my identity is coming from what I do and what other people say about me and my reputation and my level of achievement and all that stuff. Certainly it's a part of it. It'll always be part of it. I keep kind of rattling around in my head, like what are, what are tangibly some things that I've seen you do or that I've attempted to do that at moments I'm like proud of? Like, yeah, okay.

46:47 That was good. That makes sense. I think that was proactive. Right. And I think just in regard to this conversation and what you just said, I guess the thing that I've seen consistently in you is two things. One, you are pretty damn radically transparent with your kids and your family. Now, part of it's your verbal processor, right? By default. But, and it's, that's not just happening without intentionality, for sure. So what I've seen you do is you reflect on things and you have no problem circling back on a topic to discuss it further with the audience. And right now I'm talking very specifically about your spouse and your kids.

47:29 And then I think the other thing that you've done consistently is you just process with them what you're trying to do, where you see it not going the way that you want and or would like, and that you have some commitments to make some adjustments. And, you know, not to like turn this into a 10 point, you know, presentation on how you fix things. being a better, better relationship. I think that's kind of the low hanging fruit. I think that's the start. Like just tell your family and your kids and your relationships, what you're wrestling with and be honest with the fact that like, I am driven. I love my company. I love building. I love the addiction that I have to the fact that I'm doing something that allows others to experience it.

48:09 There's nothing wrong with you verbalizing why you chase and why you build as an entrepreneur or as a leader. Um, Because that's okay. And that's in your DNA. And you've been designed to a certain perspective to do that. Yeah. And it's also okay for you to say where you feel like at times that creates some pain or challenges in terms of what time you're able to leverage or give to other things and other aspects of your life. And like even that, like just doing that alone is impressive and meaningful because your kids are inevitably going to wrestle with similar types of confrontation and friction.

48:51 And them just watching a man... you know, cause we're talking dads right now, watching a man be vulnerable and process out loud the gaps that he or she sees between where they're at currently and what they're trying to achieve. Like just in that alone, you can create some meaningful engagement with your kids and your spouse and, and just kind of, even the trajectory. I, maybe for me, that's more, more of a thing because I'm more of an internal processor, more by default. Like if I'm left alone, I'm going to think about shit a long time. Yeah. Is that true? Most of the time that's true. And so I think just my kids being able to hear me think about stuff and process what I'm trying to do and where I've fallen down and where I'm picking myself back up.

49:37 Like there's no shame in that. Yeah. And if you're trying to hide those kinds of things from your family and your, in your relationships, I'm, that's probably the biggest failure that you're living out. Yeah. Like it's, it's not that you're not perfect and that you don't, and that you make mistakes and that you do give a lot to your business. That's probably actually not where you're falling down. It could just simply be, you're not talking about what that gap looks like and that you're actively wanting to do something about it. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. No, I, I agree. Yeah. It's a, it's a, I think it's worthwhile thing to think about. And you know, I was just like, I'm thinking about how when we started this conversation and I was like talking about how lucky I am and stuff like, like when I say that, that's not me being falsely humble.

50:24 It's actually, it's totally not. I think one of the things that's become really apparent to me is I've gotten older. That's when I'm 45, right? And, uh, I look around at other people's situations in the lives that they've come from and that they lead. And I think what I just realized is whether you want to say that God put me in this position or you have some other worldview of what that is, the point of the matter is I didn't choose God. I didn't choose the parents I was born to. I didn't choose where I was born. In many ways, I didn't choose that eventually I was going to meet you. Yeah. I didn't choose that.

51:04 Yeah. That wasn't me masterminding. Yeah. When Brian Facebook messaged me and we're having lunch at Gilgamesh Brewery. Like I didn't choose that. Yeah. Yeah. There's something beyond just my choosing and my ambition that's got me here that I didn't choose. And that phone call with my boy, I have to accept the gratitude and the luck of that, that I didn't choose the makeup of my brain and the unique combination of my parents for me to even think about and care about some of these things. And so it's like, I feel like there's a real, a natural, like an organic humility that flows out of that reflection.

51:46 Yeah. Now many of us also had the luck of being born into a very difficult situation. I also recognize that. And therefore it's like, I feel a compulsion because I was lucky in so many ways to have a really great start and to have great raw material that I was given. Mm-hmm. Then the question becomes, what am I responsible to do with the luck I've been given? Hmm. How am I supposed to equip and support others around me who maybe were dealt a much more difficult hand? Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. And I think there's a really beautiful, there's something really beautiful about that.

52:27 And I think it speaks to those of us who are finding ourselves in a really fortunate position with our businesses, with our families, whatever. It's like, man, what? what am I supposed to do with that good fortune? Is it just to keep chasing as much as I can possibly accumulate? What am I supposed to do with that? You know? And anyway, hopefully there's, I don't know, something there that people can relate to or resonate with, or it provokes some kind of thought for folks. But can I maybe lead us towards a closer here? I've got kind of a track, a thought track here. I want to share with people. You know, at the beginning of this conversation, there was two things I think that your story pointed towards.

53:08 One was your pursuit of your father in those last couple years and how meaningful and productive and fruitful that pursuit was. Yeah. Okay. I also heard in that same kind of place was a reflection on the gratitude that you felt when your son leaned in and said thank you for the things that you've been trying to do as the father with your son. Yeah. And this is kind of where my head goes, guys, as far as this show and maybe just like a place to, maybe a place to go with this once you're done listening to it.

53:49 And I don't want you to hear a challenge because this is, again, Chris and I try to be very diligent about reminding you all that go along the journey with us that this is the, we don't, we're not telling you things because we've hit the apex. We're sharing with you the journey that we're on. And so there's a challenge here. And this is for the males. Okay. I'm talking about dads. Sons, husbands right now. Interesting. Now I'm kind of getting emotional. Think about this. The start probably is just leaning it. So if you're a son and you have a broken relationship with your dad and the reality of it is, is that idiot did a lot of dumb shit to, to earn the chat, to earn the fact that you're angry and segregated or separated from that relationship.

54:34 Yeah. I think ask yourself what's more important. Is it more important to you to be right or to potentially work towards getting a relationship that is more important than who's right or wrong? And so if you're a son, lean in. And if you're a dad and you've done what many of us have done and that is maybe not prioritized or fought hard enough for that relationship between you and your kids, now's a good time to start. It doesn't matter if they're 60 and you're 80, because I know we've got a couple 80-year-olds plus that listen to our show. It doesn't matter if you're in your 40s and your kids are in their 20s, and it certainly doesn't matter if they're babies.

55:17 Lean in now. Whatever yesterday was, who cares? Who gives a shit? Yesterday was yesterday, and today is a different day. And whatever day it is and time of day that you're listening to the show, Please don't push stop and then act the same way you did before you listened. How's that? That's for all of us. That's for Chris and I too, to make that commitment and live that out as well. Like lean in, prioritize. Today's a new day. Yesterday didn't matter. Let's do something different today. I guarantee you that for all of us, this is true for all of us listening. If we lean in and we tackle this thing now and we prioritize the relationship now, you will not regret that.

56:01 You will regret getting to the end and being in that fucking room alone. That you will regret. That you will regret. But you won't regret leaning in and starting new right now. So there you go. All right, everybody. Hey, thanks for joining us for another episode of Head, Heart, and Boots. And if you're enjoying the show, but you love this episode, please hit follow, formerly known as subscribe, write us a review, or share this episode with a friend. Share it on LinkedIn, share it via text, whatever. It all helps. Thanks for listening.